Thank you, and I am glad to hear that you were recently reminded of something you had love for. I had a similar experience when joining Lemmy about 2 years ago. It drove me to begin keeping a general book for journaling.
To that end, if you intend to take your rediscovery of your love of writing further, a recommendation of mine would be to find both a book and pen that you like. Something with a cover or paper which you enjoy, and something which makes it feel easy and smooth to write with. In doing this I have found that it has reminded me to write and allows me to enjoy doing so much more.
In my case I found a green, hard covered book, with a relief of a tree on the front. The cover has a soft wrap which makes it feel good to hold and warm to the touch. It has two tongues for keeping place.
My pen is a very cheap but nicely made Muji brand aluminum fountain pen with which I use Waterman black ink. It writes smoothly and the pages soak the ink in well. It is also not so expensive that I would be worried if I lost it. It has a knurling which makes it easy to hold, and the cap posts in the back in an unconventional manner.
I have found writing for myself has helped me when writing for others, the only difficult part was remembering to begin.
Yes, the fear is typically that we don’t want to be accused of following you, sneaking up on you, or being creepy, so there is usually some noise or overt thing we do to try to imply we are just minding our own business.
Sometimes to avoid the situation all together, (let’s say I am walking home at night and I see some woman walking the same direction ahead of me, and I know I am going to end up passing her because my pace is faster), then we will literally cross the street just so that we don’t have to be put in the awkward situation of walking up to and past you at 3 am on a public sidewalk.
There are other things beyond this as well that men do or avoid doing which women might not realize. Most men in my experience are really careful to never be left alone with children for example. No one blinks an eye if a woman is, but men have learned to avoid potential false accusations in this way as well.
A lot of men are fearful to do something as simple as taking their kids to the park because of this. You can search for articles in which fathers who take their own kids to the park have been accused of being pedophiles just for sitting on a bench while their children play, or accused of kidnapping just because they are an adult man with a child in public. You won’t find any articles about this happening with a woman.